Written by Rachel L. Ritter
So my husband is in the Army and has been for the past 16 years. Right now he is in South Korea and doesn’t have much longer to go for this unaccompanied PCS. For those that don’t know, a PCS means permanent change of station. This happens when you’ve been stationed somewhere for too long and the Army needs you somewhere else.
*Speaking about the Army like this makes me think of Buster from Arrested Development. “I’m going to Army, mother!” If you also don’t already know what I’m talking about, the newest season is on Netflix and I was so excited about it I did a post, here.
Anyways back to what I was saying before, right now we’re at around ten & a half months of his year-long PCS. Since he’s been in, he’s been deployed to a lot of cool & different places like Africa, Romania, various training trips, Iraq and now South Korea. This deployment has been the worst because he’s the furthest away and it’s the longest time EVER. I figured I would write a post about my experiences with this and any other past deployments-it’ll act as my therapy.
I’ve learned the main important thing that has helped me is to stay busy, this can be done a lot of different ways. You could take up a sewing class, cooking lessons, or painting- anything that you’ve been wanting to do but never had time to. We have no kids right now, so my main goal was to get out there and socialize. Before he left we had gotten too comfortable by staying at home all the time. All of our close friends have moved across the country and we had moved into a new neighborhood, so we didn’t know anybody. My way of dealing with not having friends was to start a meetup.com group, Making Friends Near Ft. Bragg. Since starting it in October, we have grown to over 900+ people.
If you haven’t heard of Meetup.com it’s a really great resource to use to meet new people. You can find a group that has an interest in just about anything. If I didn’t have this group to put events on for, I would be at sitting at home crying and the time would go by SO slowly. Plus it’s great cause when he gets home we’ll know a lot more people.
While your significant other is gone another great thing to do is catch up on old shows or read books, all the ones you wouldn’t have been able to watch/read while they were here cause they’re too girly or whatever. Now that we have less than two weeks until his homecoming, I’m getting to the end of my list of things that I feel like I need to do before he gets home. It’s the usual things like clean the house, catch up on laundry, lose 10 pounds, ha! The fun part is the planning for the homecoming party, making a new list of all the shows & movies I want to watch with him, and the video games! As you can see in the post , I have been on Xbox withdrawal for the past almost 11 months.
I have a good list going of games I can’t wait to get my hands on and play:
Dead Island: Riptide
Crysis 1-3 (lol)
Mirrors Edge 1 & 2 (still deciding if I’d want to start this series).
The takeaway from this post is this: do not just sit around waiting for your significant other to come back to you. That’s too sad and long of a time to do nothing. Take this time to better yourself so you have fun things to talk about when you do get time. The conversations are more likely to be more exciting if you have stuff to share. And remember, there are tons of other people who have done this before you. You will not die because you are left alone, get out there and make friends (or hang out w/the ones you already have). Being active helps move the process along way faster. If you prefer to get your support online, there are a lot of great military themed blogs out there written by the wives, girlfriends, maybe even husbands of military people- they always have support systems and useful information. Here are a couple of my favs that I’ve have found over the past couple of months.
Check them all out, find one that has content you can relate with and get to meeting other military families in the same boat. I hope this post has helped a little. Have a great rest of your week!